"My name is Gloria. Short for Glorious."

So we have this chair.

I named her Gloria.
There’s a funny story behind this chair. When Dave & I were first married, Dave’s best friends Mom said she was redoing a chair for us as a wedding gift. “Great!” We said. “We’re excited to see it.”
We got married and she said, “The Chair is coming.

And we said, “Cool. Can’t wait.”
Months passed, and every now and then we’d see her and she’d say, “The Chair is coming.”
And we’d say, “Okay.”
Years passed. We went to Europe. Forgot all about The Chair. Upon our arrival back in Canada, we ran in to her and she said (rather excitedly) “The Chair! It’s done!”
And we scratched our heads for a moment and said, “The Chair?”
“Yes! I’ll drop it off at your grandparents for you to pick up whenever you want.” She pushed a bottle of paint towards us. “Here is a touch up kit. It’s black. Black & Gold.” And with that, she left.
Black and Gold?
I pondered this for a while. In my mind, I saw a chair. It was what they called “gold” in the 70′s, yes. But today, I think we would refer to it as “orange”.
I brought up the chair to many people.
“Black & Gold is very in this season.” They’d say and point to a Home Decor Magazine featuring it. “I’m sure it’s probably a light satiny gold material like this.”
Yes. This can work.
I started planning my whole bedroom around the enigmatic chair (which, up until this point I hadn’t seen). It would be black, white & gold. French Provincial, if you will. I made plans. It would be glorious.
Then we went to pick up the chair.
Let me tell you, it was glorious. Black and Gold? Yes. In full 1970′s velvety glory. Yes. Yes. Yes. There was no pale satiny gold here.
After spending many hours deliberating, I have decided to say “Up Yours!” To the home decor magazines that say my chair isn’t fashionable. She has seen many a classy dinner party featuring big hair, shoulder pads, and polyester. She was around when smoking was totally en vogue, and she loves sinking her feet into a plush shag carpet.
Yes, her name is Gloria.
Short for Glorious.

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