Sep 3 2014

becoming outmoded.

(Above: Dave dressed up as “Outmoded Technology Man” at a Superheroes and their Alter Egos party we went to a few years ago)

Dave and I have always had a bit of a love/hate relationship with technology/media. I’m sure that’s true for a lot of people, especially those who have to work with it on a daily basis.  When we were first married we did (what some considered) a crazy thing and never bought a TV.  Keep in mind, this was almost 10 years ago– far before Netflix, and when YouTube barely even had cat videos on it.  The idea of even owning digital versions of movies or TV shows was just barely starting to become a thing.  People would say everything from “Wow, I wish I could do something like that”, to “What are you going to do all day?”  Well, somehow, 9.5 years later we are still alive, we still have no TV (although we do have a Netflix subscription, but it’s used mainly for our regular evening Star Trek episode) and we have generally entertained ourselves pretty well I think.  Lately though–and this could be because I’m now a stay at home mom–I’ve found the internet/iPhone is eating my time up.  Facebook stays on a tab on the computer and gets refreshed often, and when I have a spare moment (when Dave and I are driving and I’m bored) I’m checking instagram on my phone.  And it’s become exhausting.

Here’s the thing:

I don’t think humans were meant for this kind of overload of information/constant stream of conversation.

As an introvert I especially find myself overwhelmed by the end of the day if I had spent too much time on Facebook.  There’s no time for my own quiet thoughts when I’m scrolling through everyone else’s.

I’m tired of a thousand articles being shared telling me that everything that I’m eating is wrong.  Do I feed my child formula?  You bet.  Do I eat food that contains gluten in it?  I do.  I’m also tired of all the facebook debates over politics/religion/whatever-the-heck that don’t actually serve any purpose.  Because, for real people, do facebook debates make anyone ever feel good?  Have you ever walked away from a facebook debate going “Wow, that internet stranger really changed my mind on that subject.  I feel so good that we had that debate.”  I’m not saying debating is bad, but I feel like most of the time internet debates get bad fast and no one wins.  Because it’s easy to say something nasty on the internet when you are safe behind your computer, but it’s not so easy to go out and do something about it.  Every day on the web we are inundated with a crap-load of opinions and voices.  I’m not sure how our brains haven’t exploded already.

I see how damaging and addictive technology can be and it’s starting to loose it’s lustre.  I used to say that I neither liked nor disliked Facebook, because for all it’s flaws I could see how valuable it was for keeping in touch with friends and family from far away.  I saw that for a small business it had huge potential for advertising, especially as a photographer.  The tool can’t be evil–it’s how you use the tool, right?  But the problem with Facebook is that even if I’m using it just to keep up with friends and family, there’s still 300 other people on my friends list that might decide that the best way to use Facebook is to share Fox New clips. (No thank-you).  Also…I don’t really want to see what everyone is commenting on.  Unless a friend of mine shares it with me, why do I want to see their other conversations?

Most of all, I’m concerned over how this will affect Lucy as she grows up.  If she sees that her dad and I are dependant on all our devices, she will assume that it’s only natural.  I’d rather wean ourselves off of being so dependant on technology while she is young so that we never have to say “Put that phone away and spend some time with real people!” while at the same time we are itching to get on our phones.

So I have decided to start a technology wean.  Dave and I have already been talking about getting rid of our smart-phones when our contract is up.  In the meantime (so it won’t be such a shock) I’ve installed an app called “moment” that counts the minutes that I use the phone and when I reach a certain number (30 minutes, for example) it tells me my time is up for the day and sends me constant reminders to put my phone down.  I also cleaned up my facebook newsfeed to a small amount of family/friends.  Also, because I have a few ongoing projects that are shared on Facebook (project 52, for example) I plan on using it till the new year, and then I hope to only use it for business purposes.  Another program that is useful is called “Self Control” where you can either “blacklist” a list of websites you don’t want to see for a set time, or “whitelist” a list of websites that will be the only available sites.  You can set the time limit, and that’s it.  It is a pretty crazy program though–even restarting your computer won’t shut it down!

I’m looking forward to reseting and using technology as a tool instead of a crutch and I encourage you to do the same.

3 comments


Jul 2 2014

june in review.

I’ve come to discover (or maybe I’ve always known) that I am basically incapable of being consistent with blogging.  I really do love it, but I tend to forget that it exists and all of a sudden I realize I haven’t done anything except the weekly project 52 for a long time.  I won’t promise that will change.  But–I did put it in my calendar to do a monthly review at the end of each month (which…I’m late on…haha) and I do have some things I’d love to do but you know how it is.  Life happens.

So here’s June.  Mostly in iPhone pics.  I can’t believe it’s over!  Where the heck did it go??

(above: We had to lower the crib because this started happening.  She is SO determined!)

I don’t know how Lucy has gotten away with only getting swatted at ONCE by this cat.  Seriously…

We’ve been trying to get out of the house more on family outings.  We went to Fort Langley at the beginning of June and it was lovely!

She started sleeping on her stomach.  Scared the heebie jeebies out of me when it first happened (above) because she was asleep for over two hours which NEVER happens.  Now she has been sleeping so much better.

We started baby led weaning with Lucy.  She’s still not terribly interested, but for all her issues with food we think this is the safest way to introduce food to her without her hating it.  It’s a very slow process.

Our bedroom makeover (which started last summer long before Lucy was born) is 98% complete!  It only took a year…

This is his new spot to sleep.  We’ve been concerned about his health lately and the fact that he may not have as long of a life as we would like.  He just turned 9 this month.  Who knows, maybe we’ll get 9 more years…and he will just be a grumpy old man.

I’ve been sewing a lot more again.  I made this skirt one afternoon, and it’s a great piece for all year round.  But now my sewing machine has bit the dust…(well, it probably just needs to be serviced) so I’ve got to wait to finish all my projects.

I found a really exciting chair on craigslist for $20.  It needs love, but we’re good at that.  All the wood is getting sanded down and refinished, and I’m redoing the upholstery (to fix a terrible reupholster that probably happened in the 80′s).
Dave and I celebrated our 9th anniversary in June!  Crazy!  We went to see Bobby McFerrin at Orpheum during the Vancouver jazz festival.  My mind was officially blown.  Such an incredible concert (and makes me feel like I need to seriously brush up on my scatting).
Hope everyone had a fabulous June!  I’m looking forward to the warm weather in July, as well as a visit from my brother and his family from Montreal!

COMMENT.


Jan 12 2013

to better days ahead.

I haven’t really written on my blog for quite some time.  When I have, it’s been intermittent and  impersonal.  Let me explain.

Saturday, December 29th was gearing up to be a pretty good day.  Dave and I hadn’t had any time off together for a LONG time.  This was the first Saturday in literally MONTHS that we had no engagements.  We were planning on going to Fort Langley to the antique malls for the day.  It’s one of our favorite things to do.

Instead we spent the day in the emergency room at the hospital.  I was 9 1/2 weeks pregnant and things weren’t looking swell.  After waiting and waiting for results, the Dr. told me despite what I had been experiencing, things looked fine.  Just to be sure, however, he set me up for an emergency ultrasound for the next morning.  We tried to reason with him, because with Dave being a pastor and me scheduled to play piano that Sunday morning, doing an ultrasound would not fit.  He insisted that it would be done first thing and we’d have enough time to get to the church.  I was actually quite relieved at this point.  Many people that I knew had their ultrasounds at 9 weeks (or even earlier) and my doctor was only going to do my first at 20 weeks.  Even when I had spoken with him about the trouble I had been having, he maintained that everything was fine and there was no need for an ultrasound that early.

Sunday morning we rushed to the hospital to get our ultrasound.  I was excited because we had plans with some friends that evening and were going to tell them the good news.  It would have been even more exciting to have an ultrasound picture to show.

The ultrasound technician explained what was he was going to do, and that he would recommend that I go to emergency when I had time (if the results were good) or right away (if, from what he could tell the results were not good).  After the first ultrasound he discovered my uterus is retroverted (tilted backwards) which makes it difficult to see anything with a standard ultrasound (especially at only 9.5 weeks).  He then performed an internal ultrasound and without saying anything else, told me that I had to go directly to emergency.  Despite the fact that he gave me no exact results, my suspicions of a failed pregnancy were confirmed at that point. I had been experiencing problems from 5.5 weeks and even though I had gone to the doctors almost every week with questions he said I was fine.  I think I knew even then that it wasn’t.

At that point I had to sit and wait in emergency for another few hours (I don’t know exactly how long actually…it could have been 5 minutes for all I know).  Dave had to leave to go and lead worship at church (now without piano player), and so my parents joined me while I waited.  The staff at the hospital was all very kind and professional, but in the end told me what I didn’t want to hear (not their fault though): that the fetus had recently died, there was no heartbeat, and I would miscarry in the next few days.

The following days need no explanation, but let me just say that when doctors say that miscarrying is just like a “heavier period”, it’s a farce.  It’s not.  Maybe if you are 4 weeks pregnant.  But not if you are 2.5 months.  (Perhaps some lady doctors need to speak with all the man doctors and tell them what it’s really like). **side note** I chose to miscarry naturally.  Many people choose a surgical process called a D&C, or they take a drug called Misoprostol when they are past 8 weeks or so.  I decided that since this was not a medical emergency, medical intervention was not needed.  My body would do what was necessary to compete the process. **

So there it is.  My crummy New Years un-celebration.

Why am I sharing this?  I don’t know.  Perhaps I feel like I need to explain why I’ve been a zombie for the last 2.5 months (it can be so frustrating in the first trimester when you feel tired/sick/gross/grumpy and no one knows what’s going on) …Or why I haven’t been in church for the last 2 weeks…or why I may not feel like talking to pregnant people in the next little while.  Maybe it’s needs to be shared because a lot of girls don’t realize how common all of this is…until of course it happens to them and people start whispering their stories. In reality, doctors estimate that 70% of women will have at least 1 miscarriage in their life. It sucks.  But it is a natural process of procreation.  As the doctor at the hospital explained: there was nothing I could do, or he could do.  Sometimes things don’t match up and the body says “This isn’t going to work out.  Let’s try again.”

So that’s what we will do.

In the mean time, lady friends, I urge you to be more open about this.  I think that so many people think it’s a shameful thing.  I know for me I felt sick to my stomach when I had to email some acquaintances whom I had impulsively shared my pregnancy with, that I had experienced a miscarriage.  I felt like a loser.  Completely untrue…but that’s how it felt.

So don’t be afraid to share your story…or just share my story…whatever helps people realize that this is not a shameful thing.  It does not make a person a failure.  I don’t want to scare potential young moms…just to inform.

If anyone has any questions about miscarriage, I am 100% here to answer them and talk about it.

6 comments


Oct 18 2012

lately…

…I celebrated my 27th.  With pumpkin pie, of course…

…These things have been changing colour and falling like crazy.  Best ever…

…It’s been cold enough in the mornings that this little one wears her plaid cloak for our walk…

…It’s been raining.  A lot… (which I like)

…Walks in places like this get better and better…

…I’ve been editing/working in this kind of light.  Much more relaxing. Also, lately I just redid the lining on my vintage jacket, which up until now has been named “Kitty”…however…

…As I was taking off the fur on the collar (to re-line it) I found a coat check ticket slipped in between the fur and the collar.  Turns out Kitty’s name is actually Dolores.  I plan on sewing the tag back into the coat, along with my name (and the date) on another piece of paper.

I’m excited that fall is in full swing.  I’m taking full advantage of all the pumpkin/spiced/basically-any-festive-fall-foods that I can.  All the while wearing slippers, cozy pyjamas and reading on the couch while it’s cold and rainy outside.  Those are the best kinds of evenings.

I Hope your fall is going splendidly!  Next thing we know it we’ll be singing Christmas songs and sipping eggnog.  Oh wait…I’ve been doing that already…(to be fair, I’m practicing Christmas songs in choir, and Dave bought eggnog because it was on sale…so there. :P )

2 comments